Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Pope Uses Man as Prop for Newest Photo Op

Pope Francis is working on a collection of photographs about himself to be titled The Pope Condescends. He's already been seen washing feet, taking a bus, and refusing to wear a cape. As one observer put it, "Imagine a horribly abusive yet powerful man wearing a top hat. Now imagine a horribly abusive yet powerful man without a top hat. Francis is the guy without a top hat."

The newest photograph that will enter The Pope Condescends is a picture of Francis kissing a horribly disfigured man. When reached for comment, the Pope said, "Can you believe I actually touched this disgusting piece of shit? I mean, people line up to kiss my ring, and here I am grossing myself out with his boily-ass face."

It has been reported that Catholics and non-Catholics alike have been wetting their panties for the picture. "He's just like Jesus," one fan screamed. "Except that, unlike Jesus who apparently had the power to heal people in this condition, Francis just closes his eyes earnestly and waits for the flashbulbs. He's an absolute dream!"

Read the full story here.